No one is going to argue that divorce is a good thing. It's not. Even in the best cases, where the split is amicable and no children are involved, the details are messy, the cost is high, and two people walk away scarred. But not everyone was meant to be together forever, despite their best intentions. Marriage is work, and it is harder than anything you've ever had to work for. If people commit to this work and they still aren't gelling, I truly think it is best for them to walk away.
There can be an upside to divorce. My parents divorced after 21 years of marriage when I was 10 years old. They both went on to remarry (and they both have been with these "new" spouses for 25 years now), and in the process I gained a stepsister who is the same age as my genetic sister and three step brothers who are about a decade older than myself.
Honestly, I can't imagine my life without these additional people. I love all of them. My stepmother served as a mentor for me when I was an angst-ridden teenager and couldn't always effectively communicate with my parents; my stepfather is one of the most intelligent people I've ever met...with a dry sense of humor and quiet demeanor; my stepsister is a loving, warm, and beautiful person; and while I'll admit to not knowing my stepbrothers as well as I would like because the age difference, I feel a kinship with them nonetheless. In fact, my stepbrother P recently read this blog and announced that he too shares the unique ability to find four-leaf clovers--so we're still getting to know each other, as time and circumstances allow.
Few divorces have such happy endings, I know, and this is why I am truly grateful for these "step" (such an ugly preposition) relatives who comprise my extended family. I wish everyone could be so lucky.
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